Free to a good home:

Slightly sticky, temperamental 2o month old girl. Does not listen. Throws toys. Pulls tail of cat. Bangs toys on television. Throws food. Does not nap. Can't dress herself, but can undress. Knows lots of words but will only say Daddy!Help! when mommy asks questions.

I know it's long shot, but if anyone wants her for a day (or eight), she's all yours.

Willing to take teenager in exchange. At least you can reason with them. Sort of.

Ok, you can't, but at least when you put them in their room, they can listen to their ipod and read a book.


(Mom - I know this is the universe correcting itself. Please stop laughing at me.)